My 12 year old grandson, who has had type 1 diabetes for a year and a half, behaved inappropriately at a recent holiday dinner, and I was told by my son that we had to expect bad behavior because of his diabetes. Is there any book I can send to my son and daughter-in-law (who is a psychiatric social worker) to help them deal with the emotional problems of diabetes or should I just stay out of it? I fear my grandson is going to have a double handicap — diabetes and a warped personality.

Diabetes never causes misbehavior. However, some parents feel so sad and guilty about how unfair diabetes is that they will permit behavior that would otherwise not be tolerated. At times, this is a parent’s attempt to tip the scales of fairness back. Unfortunately, it does not work that way, and often times their children learn that the rules of socially appropriate behaviors do not apply to them now that they have diabetes. Of course, this only sets the child up to have more difficulties as they grow.

One book that might be helpful is called: The Ten Keys to Helping Your Child Grow Up With Diabetes by Tim Wysocki, Ph.D.

JWB